Bob and Up On the Roof - Senility Hits Home

True to form for me these days, if given a job to do, I have a tendency to leap from one thing to another and somehow am not as easily able to multitask as I was before!  Unfortunately, sometimes it can have comedic consequences as my poor husband found out.

It was a simple task - all I had to do was answer the phone but somehow my blonde old lady brain because distracted by the fact that I suddenly remembered I had to clean the bathrooms for company that was coming. 

Here is my story of how poor Bob unfortunately paid the brunt of my flagging memory!

You-Know-You-Have-Become-Senile-When-Or-Up-On-The-Roof

City Slicker Meets Camping 101

When my husband and I were first dating, he was mad about camping and since I was mad about him, I decided to try it and see if I could 'grasp' it - with varying results over the years.  However, as in most things, you always remember 'your first' experience and this was a nightmare.  Oh well - I lived through it with humorous stories to tell afterwards.  Also included in my tale is a hilarious video from youtube on camping.

http://hubpages.com/hub/Teaching-a-City-Slicker-to-Camp-Who-Knew

The Dancing Fool In A Redneck Town

Okay - so it's my own fault - I moved to a 1-horse redneck town and for 5 years now, I've been trying to fit in - really I have!  It's just not my style - I am a southern California girl born and bred (enough said right there, eh?).  I'm getting really, really tired of having City Slicer written on my forehead no matter what I do here. 

One Friday night, I got myself into a bit of hot water down at the local tavern.  Fortunately, I did not become embroiled in any bar fights, though in retrospect, that might have been my first choice had I been a little more 'up' for the evening.  Instead, I found myself corralled so to speak into dancing with - wait for it - NOT the Marlboro Man (no - of course not) but instead Yosemite Sam!  Oy vey.....how do these things happen to me?

I was innocently sitting there sipping my beer after eating a 30 pound hamburger and lo and behold, before I knew what hit me, I had been volunteered to dance the 2-step - or some form of do-si-do - I never will know because the room was spinning faster than a top before I knew what hit me. 

All I can say in retrospect is that next time I venture into one of the taverns here, I'm donning a postop shoe and claiming I had foot surgery!  No way Jose am I making such a spectacle of myself again - whether I want to fit in or not!

Dancing-Fool-Meets-Do-Si-Doon Hubpages

Maybe I Could Have Made the Special Olympics

Okay, so maybe I wasn't the most agile of athletes nor the most proficient at any sport, but I have to say, what I lacked in coordination and skill, I more than made up for it in drive and perserverance.  Too bad I failed miserably as a child to come up with anything that even resembled athleticism!  I surely wanted to.

As a child brought up by a music teacher who lived and breathed music, literature, music, theater, music (did I mention music?), it was not very easy to excel at sports.  I was not even allowed to play sports as I might 'damage' something like my hands, which were only supposed to be used for playing piano, accordion, or the clarinet.  I have to insert here that I was NOT a willing musician by any means.  I had this longing to do sports and as you can see from my post, it did not go well.  Maybe in retrospect, I should have stuck to my musical endeavors after all (although I was most famous for getting my dress caught in my accordion rather than for my musical abilities).

The moral of my story is never quit - never say you cannot do anything! And even if you can't do it well, do it for comedy!  At least I could excel at that one thing.  If they had had Comedic Olympics or at the least Special Olympics back in the 1960s, who knows - I could have been very famous.

http://hubpages.com/hub/I-Could-Have-Been-a-Gymnist-In-The-Olympics